Humour: All we have to do is to advertise

By | July 8, 2015

I grew up in business family and learned many business secrets through our ancestors. However, I never could estimate the power of advertisement till recently.

To start with, consider the educational circle. At present, the admission season is hot. Newspaper, TV, radio and internet are filled with tall claims of each college. A college claims 100% placement support ( with the best use of different font sizes you can imagine), while hundreds of the colleges claim the best infrastructure (with the best use of Adobe Photoshop’s image tricks of turning dilapidated buildings to effulgent monuments). To bewilder the minds of innocent, they give rankings unheard of like ranked #1 college in William Turing’s best colleges in India or Times Turner Classification or Global School Ranking of Times (I just hope that they do not clash with some real terms and I would not be sued). Doesn’t they sound quite impressive? To add flavor, you can spice the ad up by adding world class faculty (if you are a new college in this business, here is our simple recommendation: take a shoot of some of your good looking faculty in formals and make sure that they are smiling with elegance). I am sure a good photographer can help you. A�Also, make sure that your website is polished up with similar slogans and some catchy photographs.

This seems to have become complete formula for filling up seats in most colleges and universities. Oh, I forgot an important phrase! It is the phrase “international students.” When you have such A�gullible audience, why work harder on preparing students for getting good placements, spend salary to attract good faculty, channelize your efforts for creating support infrastructure, etc.? The prospective students do not go deeper into analysis of each college. They apply simple formula “More ad = More credibility” If you are a part of new college, best luck to you for your college. Do not forget to acknowledge the tips provided by this page
though when you succeed.

Next comes in our advertisement race, our coaching centers. Forget whatever you have read till now as the formula is entirely different. You need better facts. You need to show that you have AIR 1, AIR 2 and AIR 3 and x number of students in top 100 (where x approaches min. 50). It is no mean task to get these ranks every year by any coaching institute. If you are too worried how to get them year after year, we are there to help you. Lets take GATE coaching as an example. You can easily generalize them to IIT JEE, Medical, etc. Well, follow these simple tips A�(note: All tips are essential, do not skip even once):
Tip#1: Start your test series and make sure that you have taken GATE enrollment number etc. so that you can use them later to collect the results. Warning: Do not declare them as test series results. Declare them as results which will naturally be interpreted as classroom results.

Tip#2: Announce after GATE exams A�on your website ( or during releasing your solutions to GATE paper etc.) that AIR#1 will get a trip to Switzerland along with her/his parents and a Honda City, Air#2 will get a trip to Singapore along with Maruti Dzire, and so on. Do you see the connection how it will help your institute? If not, then you are too dull headed for business and you better not start anything. It is too elementary. Let’s say that I am AIR#1 but I did not study in your coaching center. Are you not attracting me to sell my name for close to Rs. 10+ lakhs?

Tip#3: Keep 10-20% of your budget for making relationship with media who would write pumped up reports about you, and you will advertise toppers of your institute in newspaper, etc.

Also, I forgot to tell you that do NOT tell how many % of students get selected from your institute (anyway you wouldn’t even if you are featherbrained). The % would be probably close to same % of students who get selected without your coaching.

These and some other smaller tips will ensure that you have a regular supply of students.

What a game of advertisement? What a loss to the country? If all somebody has to do is to concentrate on advertisement without imparting quality education, whose loss is it? Some coaching centers that I know of have 300+ students sitting in a class. The students cannot ask any question. There is no one to resolve their doubts or give personal attention. The teachers keep changing (not by choice) like the changing seasons. And if you look over the websites of big players: first 10 AIRs will be common to many of them. No wonder bright students have to take a lot of coaching! These top AIRs are also so smart that they take
coaching in institutes in North India as well as in South India. One student that I personally know of got AIR#2 on his own (with some help from seeing videos of Raman classes), but which coaching center is there that does not own his name (except Raman classes, of course)?

The coaching centers play on the psychology of the students by projecting Rank#1, Rank#2, etc. They would not allow someone to take demo classes, nor you can interact with senior students (otherwise “pol khul jayegi”). The students are attracted by flashy projection of ranks much more than substance of dedicated teachers, who can transform individual’s life. They do not ask the profile of teachers. They do not ask % selection. Even after taking admission in such coaching centers at big cities, you don’t understand much but you can’t verbalize your difficulty to others as the ad psychology is very heavy. You begin wondering that possibly you are only one who is academically weak/unintelligent. Thus, instead of inspiring students, such coaching centers end up in diminishing the confidence of students at large. Whose loss is it?

Coaching institutes are not bad. Just like there is coaching for music, there is coaching for sports, there is coaching for arts, there is coaching for nursing, there is coaching for GATE, there is coaching for IIT JEE and so on. The word coach in Oxford dict. means “a tutor who gives private or specialized teaching.” Coaching is required to bring the best of students, to give them individual feedback, to give them individual attention, and to mold their lives in proper direction. Then naturally, even average or below average gains something valuable by (a) the efforts of “coach” and (b) the relationship between the coach and the students. Naturally then the coach must take personal interest in his or her students. Such students would obviously do well in the exams as well as their career. The % results of such coaching centers would be enormously high as compared to large scale commercial coaching giants. They would contribute substantial to the nation’s growth. That is so unique about Raman classes, I feel.

What wonderful educational hierarchy exists in India! If all our schools, coaching centers, colleges and universities do quality training of students, India would produce an unmatched genre of students, who would be well groomed in every possible manner. Their conduct and qualities would be speaking high of our culture, and naturally all prosperity will reign for India. Instead of focusing on advertisement, all we should do is to do quality work. People will notice you in time. Even if they don’t notice you, you have done your small bit of work in laying a good foundation.

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One thought on “Humour: All we have to do is to advertise

  1. Amit Goel

    Classic thoughts, Pranav. The same phenomenon can be seen now in advertising about “international” school. Which school is not international? But they are sub-standard to the core.

    What you mentioned about coaching center is so true for I and many others have gone through them during IIT Jee preparation. Fortunately, now we have a new life with Raman classes. Thanks for bringing out the difference. The students here can experience a true transformation and inspiration. Amazing!

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